Wednesday, October 22, 2008

My Vacation

Title: My Vacation
By: Thomas the Kitten
Characters: Me (Thomas the Kitten) My daddies and Sir and boy.
Spankings: Boy gets a bare bottom spanking

We had a really nice wedding, my daddies and me. We got married so I would be the most popular kitty ever. I already was, but I didn’t want to hurt my daddies’ feelings, they seemed kind of excited by the whole thing.

After lots of dancing and yummy treats, I sat on my big daddy’s lap and he fed me yummy little curly pink things. Mmmmm, we have to get those at home. When it was all over my daddies gave me lots of kisses and cuddles; they told me we were each going on a vacation. I was going to stay at this cool place with the black haired men, and they were going…well I don’t remember what they said…monkey daddy was packing and he put that bottle of goo, I don’t like, in their bag so I stopped listening. Anyway, monkey daddy gave one of the black haired men all my stuff, you know my potty, my toys, my bed, my food and other stuff and they went and set them all up for me. I made sure to try everything out and make sure it was okay. Then my daddies left and I cried, and cried, and cried. The black haired man with curly hair made me a bottle and we all sat down together on their sofa. I felt better while I drank my bottle and they petted me. I must have fallen asleep, because I woke up and they were kissing all over each other. That was when I finally learned their names, Sir and boy.

The next morning, boy got upset when I was eating breakfast. He wanted to know what kind of idiot cat stands in their food. It hurt my feelings. I’m a little guy, and my food dish is BIG. It is much easier to get to my food if I don’t have to try and lift my head over that big wall on the dish. Sheesh, don’t humans understand anything.

So, after breakfast I had to use my potty. I did just like monkey daddy taught me, and I used my box. I was so proud of myself. Sometimes my daddies clap when I go pee and poo-poo in my potty. But, did boy clap? No, he got all upset about the smell, and ran around opening all the doors and windows. My daddies don’t get all upset when I have a poo. In fact, big daddy says I’m amazing, being so little and producing such a big smell.

I don’t know what boy’s problem is. He’s just a big grouch. I should have a talk with Sir, when monkey daddy gets cranky like this big daddy can fix it. So deciding I didn’t want to hang out with the grouchy face anymore, I decided I should go find Sir. I pushed the screen door open with my nose and paw, and trotted off towards the big house.

Oooo, Sir and boy have a much bigger yard than we have at home. There are lots of good places to hide. I like to play hide and seek. I find the littlest places to hide, and my daddies pretend to get mad, and call my name. Sometimes they yell at each other about who was supposed to be watching me. That’s funny. Sometimes big daddy pretends to give monkey daddy a spanking by just putting a couple of swats over his clothed bottom. When monkey daddy gets a real spanking, it’s lots of smacks on his bare bottom. Monkey daddy gets sad when he gets a spanking. But I can cheer him up by letting him rub my belly and scratch my butt. That seems to make him happy. So when I heard boy start calling my name, I knew it was time to start playing hide and seek. It’s about time he came around and learned my rules.

I hid under some petunias, but he saw me. Boy plays the game perfect. He pretended to be angry when he reached for me. I jumped out and ran under his legs and then I lost him when I ran through the hedge. He kept looking for me until Sir came outside and asked him what he was yelling about. Boy told a fib and went back in the house and closed the door. Boy shouldn’t tell fibs. Monkey daddy gets spankings when he fibs to big daddy. I wonder if boy gets spankings.

Well if we weren’t going to play hide and seek anymore, I was gonna ‘splore the garden. There are lots of bugs in the garden. I like bugs. They are fun to play with. But sometimes they stop playing and just lay there not moving. I don’t like that. Then I saw a butterfly. They are my favorite. So I jumped and jumped to try and catch him. But he can fly higher than I can jump. Boy came outside when I was playing with the butterfly; he was pretending to be angry again. Woo hoo, game on. I ran back under the hedge and then up the big apple tree. I had a great view of him hunting for me from up in the tree. He was doing a really good job playing, he seemed extra angry.

Sir came back outside again to see what was going on, and boy fibbed again. This time Sir didn’t seem very happy about it and told boy to mow the lawns. Boy complained, and Sir told him to stop or he could mow the lawn with a sore butt. Monkey daddy has had to mow the lawn with a sore butt before. He didn’t like it.

I don’t like the lawn mower. I’m afraid it’s gonna run me over. I noticed from up in the tree that it was an easy jump into an open window of the big house. So I jumped in. Cool, there was a big cushy bed. So I climbed in and took it nap.

I woke up to a lady vacuuming the room. I don’t like the vacuum. It’s like an indoor lawn mower. So, I ran out of the room. I had to go potty, but I couldn’t find my box anywhere. I did find a big plant with lots of dirt. Monkey daddy wouldn’t be happy, but I had to go and it seemed like the best place.

I was sad, and knew my daddies wouldn’t be happy I had pottied in the plant. I don’t like to be naughty, unless I have planned it with the intent of fun. I didn’t potty in the big house plant on purpose. I couldn’t find my box, and I felt kind of lost. I wanted to go back to the little cottage, where my food, toys, potty and bed were. I was getting a little scared and I started to cry. I was so grateful when a nice lady found me and took me to Sir. She gave good cuddles. I was so excited to see Sir, that when he took me in his arms. I gave him lots of cuddles, and lots of purrs. I also made sure to tell him all about my morning that I wanted to go back to his house, and that I thought boy needed some attention—because he seemed a little grouchy.

Sir and I arrived back at the cottage. Sir took me to the potty. I was very excited to see my potty. I purred and made sure to tell my potty how happy I was to see it. I was a little worried about boy though. I wanted him to stop being a grouchy puss, but Sir was using the voice that big daddy uses when monkey daddy is in trouble. I hoped that Sir was telling boy the right way to play hide and seek, because boy doesn’t play properly. He has to actually find me! My daddies always find me.

Well it was probably best if I left Sir and boy to have their discussion, so I decided to do a little ‘sploring. I started in the bedroom. They had a big fancy closet, with lots of shoes. I would need to remember this would be a good place at naptime. Then I checked out their dresser. Nothing super exciting, some smelly things, a plate with some of that stuff big daddy calls money. I don’t know what money is, but big daddy makes it sound like it’s important. The bed looked like it might be comfy, so I checked it out. It smelled like Sir and boy, and I thought it needed to smell a little more like me, so I rubbed myself all over the pillows, and the blankies. Ah, much better. Since I wasn’t very tired--there wasn’t much reason to stay on the bed. I decided to check out how good of a hiding place under the bed was.

Hmm, this under the bed is excellent!!! Way better than at home. There are boxes to hide behind, and not as many dust bunnies. I don’t like dust bunnies; they make me sneeze. I like to hide in boxes, so I decided to see if I could get inside any of them. I decided to start with the big box, because the lid looked like it might be a little open. Uhhh! OOOO! Ohhhhh! Rrrrrrrr! Hsssssss! Finally after much work and a serious conversation with the lid, I got it open. Hey, this is way cool!!! This is where they keep all their cat toys. I didn’t see another cat, maybe these are all for me!!!! Hey, look they have some big cat collars in here!!! I like my collar; it was a present from my daddies. It has a little bell. I’m gonna try this one on. Ugg, help! Help! Help! Help! Oh hey, this is kind of cool, it is pink and squishy. What a cool toy! I must have it. Wait, I’m still stuck! Help! Help! Help! Yep, I’m definitely keeping this toy. Prrrrrr! Prrrrr! I want out of this collar! Help! Help! Help!

Sir and boy came running to save me. Sir lifted me out of the box. He and boy were laughing! Laughing at me! Sir took the collar off of me and set me on the bed. He patted my bottom and told me to stay out of trouble. Hmff. I turned around, so I wasn’t looking at either Sir or boy, and began to clean my paws they seemed a little dirty. I finished giving myself a bath, and then I took a nap.

I woke up from my nap, and the house was quiet. I wondered out into the big room and saw boy reading something. I wanted to see what it was…I like to read too. So, I jumped onto his lap and stood on his book, so I could see the letters. Boy got all mad, and said bad words, and then he put me back out in the garden and shut the front door. I was not happy. I cried, and cried, and cried, but the mean boy wouldn’t answer the door. So I decided to go back to the big house and find Sir. There was a door open so I wondered in. There was a big kitchen, and it smelled good. Like when big daddy makes cake. I hopped up on a chair and then on the counter, and there were pans with the greasy powdery stuff that tastes really good…so I started to lick at the pan. And then this scary old lady yelled at me and started chasing me with a broom! I cried and ran really fast out of the kitchen and down the hall and right into Sir. He saved me from the scary lady. He said he was going to take me back to see boy. I wasn’t happy and I scratched Sir. I wanted to stay with him. He was much nicer than boy. We got back to the little house, and Sir was not happy with boy. He asked boy how I had gotten out again…and boy didn’t answer Sir. Sir said maybe they should go discuss it in the study. Boy seemed sad and said they might as well he was going to end up there anyway. I decided to go have a snack while they went to talk. Then I heard the smacking sound, like when big daddy spanks monkey daddy. I ran to the study, and peeked my head around the door…oh my goodness, boy was over Sir’s lap, getting his bare bottom spanked. Poor boy, he had been kind of mean, but I know that monkey daddy doesn’t like to have his bottom spanked. Then boy started to cry. I hate it when my monkey daddy cries…and when boy cried it made me sad, so I went and hid in the bathroom cupboard.

I hid in the cupboard for a long time, until I heard someone in the bathroom, so I poked my head out of the cupboard, and saw Sir having a potty. I said hello, and he jumped up and got some pee on the floor. Then he was mad…so I decided I should go see boy. Monkey daddy likes to cuddle after a spanking.

I went into the study and boy was lying on the couch with a soft blanky draped over him. I hopped up onto the couch and rubbed my face against his cheek. He sniffed and told me to go away. Monkey daddy used to say that too, until he figured that he would feel better if he rubbed my belly and scratched my butt. I rubbed my head against boy again and started to purr. He started to rub my ears, and I could tell he was starting to feel better, so I flopped on my back so he could rub my belly. That would make him feel really good!!!! Eventually boy fell asleep, and I stayed on the couch to protect his bottom in case Sir decided to spank it again. Sir poked his head in the room, and I growled at him. He laughed and told me to take good care of boy and to behave myself. Sheesh! I always behave myself.

After that boy and I were good friends, mostly because he learned how to do stuff the right way. He fed me on time, didn’t complain about my potties, played hide and go seek the right way and gave me lots of cuddles. Then one night when boy and I were cuddling the doorbell rang. Sir got up to answer it, and in walked my daddies!!!! I was so happy to see them. I jumped off of boy’s lap and ran to my daddies…okay I ran up monkey daddy’s body. It was faster than waiting for him to pick me up. Monkey daddy laughed and gave me lots of kisses. I purred, and purred, and purred.

Monkey daddy handed me to big daddy and I purred, and purred, and gave him lots of cuddles. Then monkey daddy had all my things gathered up and me and my daddies went home, and lived happily ever after.

The End

Copyright Thomas and Tarabeth 2008

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